People know your name, not your story. They’ve heard what you’ve done, but not what you’ve been through. So take their opinions of you with a grain of salt. In the end, it’s not what others think, it’s what you think about yourself that counts.
I’ve just seen this quote shared on one of the Facebook pages I follow and it has inspired me to write! People really are so quick to judge others without knowing the full story. I know because I used to be one of them. I also used to be very self-conscious and unsure of myself and would inwardly beat myself up for saying this or that or for generally not being good enough.
I grew up in an environment where love was conditional and based on my performance. By the time I left home this pattern was well established and I would feel good about myself only if I received affirmation from others. However, if someone did say something nice to me I always felt like it had a use-by-date on it and this would make me almost immediately start looking for new encouragement. I was in a constant state of looking outside of myself for validation.
Eventually I got fed up with this way of living and began to look for answers. I have always loved reading and so I turned to books to find what was “wrong” with me. I have read many excellent titles these last 5+ years, but would like to share one of my recent reads with you. Running on Empty by Dr Jonice Webb describes very well what so many of us have had to deal with – Childhood Emotional Neglect.
Are you feeling downhearted, defeated, depressed because you don’t feel good enough, beautiful enough, successful enough? If you haven’t already, I would encourage you to start on a journey of self-discovery. Find a copy of Running on Empty or look for other books, blog posts, etc that will help you to make peace with your past and who you are. Because you are valuable, you do have worth, and you are okay…Just. As. You. Are.
We were all born with value, potential, creativity…we’ve just forgotten. We were born into our parent’s stories and their unresolved hurts and pain. Many of us were beaten down, given messages about our worth, or more likely, our lack of it. But we can rediscover who we were made to be. It’s not what others think about us, its what we believe about ourselves that counts!