TGIF #3

Thank God it's Friday!(1)

This week has been challenging for me as my husband and I have been adjusting to living under the same roof again. It’s felt like an emotional roller coaster at times and my head space has been rather cluttered.

I am happy to report that we are making headway. This afternoon we had coffee together and came up with a basic routine for the two weeks of school holidays. Already this has helped to clear a lot of my mind-clutter. Afterwards I came home and rushed about sorting some of the clutter pile in our dining area. It all helps!

This week I’m Trusting that hubby and I will continue to find our way back to a close relationship and better communication.

I’m Grateful for the ongoing support of my therapist and my Dad.

I’ve not lacked inspiration for blog posts but have struggled with finding time to write a “meaty” post this week due to the changes in our family normal. I’ve been Inspired by a Blogging University course to sort out a poll for you, my readers, to give me feedback about what you would like to read here at Unravelling Mysteries going forward. Watch this space. 🙂

Our son is still struggling a lot with anger and low self-esteem. The more I talk things over with my therapist the more understanding I gain and the more I realize how much our dysfunctional parenting (thanks to family-of-origin baggage) has contributed to how he is today. I’m grateful I’m healing from my past and learning how to be a better parent now. I’m grateful too because my husband is more on board than he’s ever been and is open to continuing to grow in his role as a dad. I’ve already seen wonderful changes in his relationship with Master Speedy this week and it’s doing my heart good! I have hope and Faith that the two of us will continue to find healing ourselves and in turn will be able to help our boy find healing and peace too.

Faith is a place of mystery, where we find the courage to believe in what we cannot see and the strength to let go of our fear of uncertainty. Brené Brown

Wishing you all some rest for your souls this weekend!

Elizabeth

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5 thoughts on “TGIF #3

  1. Another lovely post, Elizabeth! It feels like we’re on the same page in life although my background is slightly different. Funny enough, I also just found about Blogging University. I am also doing a lot of healing due to being “un-mothered” in my childhood, and that helps me to see what I could change in my relationship with my son (who is nearly 3 but also super speedy and a future dance star :). The trauma I went through this year has affected our relationship, and I realised I haven’t been there for him that much. But now I’m re-inspired and looking forward to re-connect with him stronger than ever.
    I also realised that this is not an irreversible process and indeed if you haven’t been that emotionally present for your kids, you can always start anew.
    Thank you, Vilina x

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    • Hey Vilina! It’s always lovely to see you’ve stopped by! 🙂 Thanks for commenting. It’s always good to know we aren’t alone in our struggles, eh? Your son is very blessed to have a mother who has already realized that she needs to be more emotionally present for him! Awareness is always the first step, isn’t it? When I feel really sad for what our boy went through in his early years, because of our lack of understanding, I have to remind myself that there is always hope for healing. Did you check out the book Running on Empty by Dr Jonice Webb? I see you liked my post about it. It’s great on the subject of connecting emotionally with our children after not having enough from our own parents. I’m also reading a new (to me) book on parenting that I’ll post about soon. So far it’s really good – recommended by my therapist. Thanks again for your encouragement! Really needed it today! xx

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      • Hi Elizabeth! I’m so sorry – I just saw this comment now, I don’t know why I didn’t receive an email, and to be honest, I just noticed the little speech bubble in the top right corner… I do need the Blogging U, I guess..:)
        You definitely aren’t alone on your struggles, and it’s great to know I’m not too 🙂 I found the audio book I’m listening to – The emotionally absent mother – when I was checking out the book suggested by you. And the interesting bit is that, I’ve just asked my spiritual guides and helpers (a practice I started recently, just addressing a question I have to the spiritual bodies) for some help with my son. And I think the next day I read your post and went on to check that subject on parenting. Never knew about it and now when I listen to the audio book I understand what has actually happened to me when I was little. My moment was physically absent for a period of time but I never realised she was also emotionally absent most of the time. Never knew what was missing in me… And it makes so much sense. And I understood that I also repeat some of my mum’s behaviour unconsciously… Wow! I’m looking forward to read your posts and check out the books you recommend. I’ve also decided I do want to do some therapy so I’ve asked my spiritual helpers to guide me towards the best way do it.
        I hope you had lovely holidays! And again I apologise for not replying earlier.

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  2. HI Vilina! So encouraging to read your comment! I love how resources are brought to us when we need them. It’s sad to realize that our parents have let us down, but so helpful for healing. I’m excited to read what you are becoming aware of. Your son is really blessed to have a mum who is open to learning and growing. Isn’t it great that we can make a difference for our children even when we’ve already helped to mess them up a bit due to our own dysfunction? Hope that makes sense! Anyway, it’s really encouraging to have you as a friend, someone who is on a similar learning journey. Thanks for your company! 🙂 Looking forward to keeping in touch as we go forward. xx

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  3. Thank you for your words Elizabeth! Parenting definitely IS the most difficult task while we’re here. I’m thinking this is probably WHY we’re here as well. I keep coming back round to psychology and children as the knowledge/professions/skills we most desperately need to have or work with. If that makes sense..:) Keep in touch! xx

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